Q: I'll be attending a corporate holiday party with a "black and white semi-formal attire or LA cocktail attire" dress code. Can I get some suggestions? I don't want to look like a broken groom who was just left at the alter. Thanks. —Gerard
A: For all but the most exclusive occasions, party dress rules are like speed limits: No one expects you to follow the absolute letter of the law. Or in your case, even the spirit. To wit, we ran the phrase "LA cocktail attire" through Google Translate and, here, apparently is the rough approximation: "If you look like Bradley Cooper or Johnny Depp, wear whatever the fuck you want. If you like Harvey Weinstein, consider a tie and jacket. But still wear whatever the fuck you want."
But we don't recommend dollar bill or feather prints. Instead we suggest, from bottom to top:
FOOTWEAR: If you think you can pull off a pair of sandals, then do that, and make certain you schedule a pedi for the day of. Buff. A less-bold play that still requires no lacing or socks are these Prada loafers in two-tone color and fabric.
We have been watching this Jil Sander collar for what feels like years now, wondering who might pay $1480, then $589, and now $147.25 for this item. On the one hand, we were conceptually intrigued by Sander's merchandising innovation — she was trying to appify or unbundle something that had traditionally been considered a part of a shirt or jacket rather than a standalone accessory. On the other hand, there was the item itself, which always made us think, "Damn. Somewhere, there's a really toolbaggy, circumcised leather jacket walking around." Now, months later, the snipped foreskin, er, collar, can be had for a 90% discount. And yet sizes S, M, and L are still available. Verdict: Unsafe at any price!
The first in a regular series on MB: Things We Wish Women Would Wear More Often. For the inaugural post, we choose this Jil Sander silk crepe miniskirt, on sale for just $125.
Have you seen a candidate for Things We Wish Women Would Wear More Often? Send a note to email@example.com and tell us why in 140 characters or less (including the link). Example: "Don't worry, this silk crepe miniskirt always looks good. It's only available in sizes 2 – 6. http://bit.ly/1eeuKmz"
We agree, anytime you can get a Trussardi 1911 bag for $255, then get it. Meanwhile, we picked up a Number Five (very underrated/unknown Italian brand) blazer for $69 and a Jil Sander jacket for $145. NB: Buy wisely; there are no returns.
Pour 2 fingers into an empty tumbler, 3 if you're not alone.